Oooh it’s a Lagenluxe kind of day.
I’m afraid that ”tis discontinued but there’s an almost identical one which you can get £10 off if you use TOTES10 as a discount code on the website.
Aaaaaah Bollocks Dangerous has been fucking with my phone again.
The guide to wooing women by Dangerous.
Gentlemen let me share with you my excellent ideas on seduction.
Like me, you may have been with the same lucky woman for some time. You need to look after her. You need to make her feel wanted and womanly. She doesn’t want to feel unattractive and undesirable so show her some attention. Tell her that she looks nice. Why not go the whole hog and let her feel the full force of your love.
Here are some top tips:
In the morning whisper the words that all women long to hear as they are getting dressed…. “Its sausage surprise time”
Don’t worry about how your morning breath smells or anything – just give her a nudge with your proud manhood.
She will be so pleased and eternally grateful that you have made her feel attractive.
If by any chance this doesn’t work and you are left frustrated, never fear for faint heart never won fair maiden. Redouble your efforts. There will be other chances throughout the morning to show her how much you admire and love her.
When she is bent over applying mascara in a mirror, simply rub your big trouser snake against her and say “I’m just going to make your day. The children are upstairs”
If she is playing hard to get as she is coy, she may reject your advances. Time to up your game menfolk.
Why not nudge her into the mirror by physically moving her with you knob whilst shouting “It’s your lucky day woman!”
She may concur that it is indeed a lucky day there was nothing sharp to hand as she wipes the black smudges from her face and removes the mascara wand from your bum hole.
Chin chin from Dangerous on Thirsty Thursday