Chicken and chorizo paella for dinner. That’s if I can be bothered to get up off my arse and go forth to cook it.
There’s just myself and two boys to feed as Bella has gone off to her friends house and Dangerous has taken up boxing. He started last Monday. I was quite worried that he’d get hurt, not from getting punched but just doing himself an injury as he doesn’t get much exercise.
He can’t just start and do some moderate exercise as he’s all or nothing which I can’t really say much about as we are both quite similar. He had to go to a proper boxing gym with professional boxers. I was rather hopeful that he’d be a bit stiff and actually concede that he was quite out of shape but no such luck. He spent the week showing off just how sprightly he was and how he could definitely raise his arms over his head. I did about 8 weeks of boxing last year and despite me being far fitter than him, I was barely able to lift a fork to my mouth a couple of days after I had partaken in punching bags. I also did wee myself every time that I did the obligatory skipping. I think that Joe who taught the class wondered just why I left the room every time I glanced at a skipping rope. It was because I had to empty my bladder in preparation.
He wouldn’t let me buy him any proper equipment either. He wanted to wear some skanky grey jogger bottoms so as to look like he’d not tried too hard.
I have of course just realised whilst I’m typing that it’s the end of the football season. He just needs something to keep him going for the next 3 or 4 weeks when there won’t be as much football on telly. No doubt there will still be some tedious FA cup shite or something else as equally dreadful.
I remember last year giving a sigh of relief when the football season ended but I needn’t have as there’s something worse even than football. Every year I forget the misery that is golf on telly. Why oh why would anybody want to watch a load of overpaid men in hideous sportswear hitting a small white ball with a metal club? I’d far rather watch them batter each other with the metal club.
I’m still hoping that some brave forward thinking production company will take me up on my idea of competitive shopping for women. It would be far more interesting than golf. We’d have to have weight divisions like in boxing. There could be size 8 and under, 10 to 12, 14 to 16 and so on.
I could be the commentator – a bit like the Mel and Sue of Bake Off. At the end of each round we could all go to the pub and act like hooligans.
I have been limbering up today by having a little potter in to Hale where I popped in to Shoetique. Monday lunch time and it was rammed with well healed ladies from Hale who must be hoping that I haven’t moved in to the area. I can tell you that property prices haven’t been affected by a a 45 minute visit but I’m thinking of holding them to ransom. Property prices would tumble if I were to be seen on the high street more than a couple of times in a week. We all know what happened to Lymm when I lived there….Through the floor!
New shoes, Clarks from www.shoetique.co.uk.
If you’d like to get anything, there’s a discount code on my Website www.totes-inappropes.co.uk. There’s a section for discount codes. Genius. This is also a thinly veiled way of getting you to look at my simply brilliant website.
Bugger – I’d better cook something.